The Disclaimer

When I heard RJ Testerman’s daughter wrote a book I was glad. She is a smart, funny, wonderful human. I briefly mentioned this book in a different post, but really had no interest in dragging her into this trauma vortex. At least not anymore than she has been by birth. Her book, On Blossoming, is self described as frank and practical advice on everything to do with puberty and female sensuality.

Since her father took my virginity when I was 13 and he was 32, you can imagine how this struck me. RJ and the community have a different view about the age of consent: they believe that “yes” is consent regardless of age. Still though, she is not me and she is not responsible for the sins of her father.

BUT

Then she and her parents, RJ and Sheri Testerman, decided to use the book as a recruitment tool. It was advertised on the front page of the Welcomed Consensus website. Their daughter wrote the book using the pen name “Gia Lynne,” and used that name for “BenchMark” MeetUps where they recruit new cult members and sensuality “students.”

Some of my followers pointed out to me the damage that could be done with this connection. The promotion of the book is linked to the promotion of a community ran by a known pedophile and sex trafficker.

So I started reaching out by email and phone to those who had/would interview or review her book. I introduced myself and gave them my site, I explained the issue was the connection to the Welcomed Consensus but not “Gia” herself or her book.

The Sex Positive Community

Many people just took down their review, interview or cancelled her appearance. Almost all wrote back expressing their concern and support for me, which was nice. Some wrote and told me how irritated they were that “Gia” had not been forthcoming with them. I was thrilled to find the sex positive community in general sincerely working on making their community safe and transparent without being puritanical.

Of course some never responded to emails or calls, but these people looked pretty smarmy as well so no surprise.

August McLaughlin who wrote Girl boner and has a radio podcast, was the first to call me and we talked for over an hour. She had just interviewed “Gia”. She made the gracious offer to post a short disclaimer stating my side, and to post one from “Gia.” August agrees that transparency is the only way to make our whole world safe, let alone our sex education. So I wrote one and sent it to her. In the end “Gia” decided not to provide her side so August will be doing something different for that episode.

I also heard from Anya Manes, the author of talkingaboutsex.com. She had reviewed the book and found the information itself useful. She added my disclaimer to her site and one of her own. You can read it here, after the interview. We also spoke for quite awhile. I really appreciated her ability to see the worth in the information and the hard place “Gia” is in. I think she has been fair.

Some Things Change

So through all this, some things have changed. Now the Welcomed Consensus has a book on Menopause on their front page; that is more fitting than one on puberty for sure. “Gia” has also removed the links to Meetups from her bio, and toned down the living in community part. In some cases the bio has been removed all together. This definitely feels like a win, albeit minor.

Some Remain the Same

This changes nothing, “Gia” is still living in the San Francisco communal house, teaching and recruiting for RJ. She may have been forced to take a step back on her online presence, but she is fully immersed still being used to garner resources. She is also still hiding the truth about RJ, as are many others.

RJ has no compunction on using the women in the group as a shield, regardless of the cost to them. Even if it is his own daughter. So in some ways nothing new here.

Thank you for the support and for reading!

Christine